Daily Prompt – Unseen: When Your Grief Sneaks Up On You

Those who have grieved, raise your hand!

Now, as you put your hand back down, think of all the other people who raised their hands with you. So many of us have experienced a time (days, months, years) when we have needed to mourn the loss of a significant person in our lives. We all know the multitude of emotions that respond to that loss: sadness, numbness, relief, anger, confusion, and guilt. Each one of us uniquely grieves. We could all lose the same significant loved one and we would still mourn their loss differently. Those who feel more relief could feel less sadness than the others. Either way, it doesn’t really matter. Grief is grief.

Any one of those emotions can just “pop up” whenever it decides to. When you’re grieving, you never know when something may trigger your sadness. You may hear a song, smell a certain aroma, watch a movie or hear an old voicemail that immediately reminds you that YOU’RE STILL GRIEVING. You haven’t “gotten over it” yet. I had one of these unseen moments the other day.

A few weeks ago, I contacted a local group of christian women who help counsel others. Most of the teens and women they help have been through a lot of abuse, trauma and loss in their lives. I wasn’t looking for a counselor because I think I need mental help, but I do think that I would tremendously benefit from talking to someone who doesn’t know me, my family or friends and can be honest with me while helping me see the things that I need to change or work on so I can grow.

So, as I am explaining to my husband two days ago that I was called for my first meeting and that I was super excited, he asked, “Why do you feel like you need to talk to a counselor? You can talk to me.” Good question. I never really thought about it. I start telling him how I think it would be great to talk to someone who has an unbiased opinion and their own personal experience in life struggles..blah, blah blah. Then, all of a sudden, BOOM! It hit me! It all became so clear.

I hear myself saying, “I really just want an older woman to talk to about womanly things. Ya know, like, just talk about life and stuff since I don’t have Mom to talk to anymore.” And just like that, I’m crying.

Once I started verbally explaining why I wanted to go, the words became so overwhelmingly painful from the grief that still lies within me, completely unseen.

Once I started verbally explaining why I wanted to go, the words became so overwhelmingly painful from the grief that still lies within me, completely unseen.

 

via Daily Prompt: Unseen

2 thoughts on “Daily Prompt – Unseen: When Your Grief Sneaks Up On You

  1. Losing a parent is always tough, especially if it’s your mother and it sounds like you were very close. Grief usually takes at least two years but can arise at anytime. Finding an older woman you can confide in is a great idea!

    Your husband sounds delightful, how fortunate you are that he will listen.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I know I am so fortunate to have a man like him. Losing my mother was/has been extremely hard. I try to not think about it sometimes but then Im reminded, randomly, that yes, she was an actual person and that I do still miss her. Grief is a weird thing. I have lost loved ones before but this has been very different. Thank you for taking the time to read my article and comment.

      Liked by 1 person

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